TEN reasons why I may turn into an ATHEIST

When I entered this world as a new born, it was all setup. People, places, religions, principles etc (etc refer to : bars, discs, strip-clubs, parliament). I started gulping the way an empty glass is filled (knowledge of course, I'm a new-born so far!). No direct experiences though. One day I learnt about the supreme power  that us lesser mortals pray, fear and respect & lie & cheat & even abuse & steal from & collect charity for & NOW even fight wars. And please! God.. if exists, is not your banker. Stop asking him for bungalows and big fat cars.
I followed all my counterparts blindly for a few years. Because I was told HE is perfect. See, if you're from some association for women's rights, neglect the previous line; and please don't jail me. SHE is perfect... too.

Good old days; me(in red) partying with God. Yeah.. we used to have a blast

But years passed, some experiences made my faith shiver. Faith in those who believed in God was gradually dying. The source may be corrupted!  Here's how it happened.


 




TEN


It was a dark night (effects, nights are always dark in this part of the world). I was sitting with my friends in a pub. Watching a football match. New in this arena. Suddenly HE entered. A creature all dressed in blue, fanning himself with what looked like a bundle of Rubles (Russian currency moron!). He booked a table by the name of Billionaire Blue, just beside us.

His eyes ran towards me, And as if his sixth sense realized I was a newbie; he approached towards me. I could see him clearly now, big eyes, chest as big as a SAMSUNG LED TV and the two trophy cases in his hand; of which one seemed untouched. He held his hand towards me to shake. Hands, you naughty naughty boy. Just than a friend of mine, heaved THIS towards me.

I ran out of the place into the dark, windy woods. Chills roller-coastering up and down my spine. I just saw a Chlesea FC fan! These creatures do exist in this universe of the almighty! My faith was badly shaken. This is how it all started.


NINE

India has produced some of the greatest musicians in the world. We have likes of A.R. Rahman in our Music Industry. BUT.. unbelievable - Pritam has fans in India. Trust me he does. And if you don't get the point I've already made, CAUTION! Here's why.

The term Music doesn't have a copyright. Thats how he named his thing Music too.
(Haha. I forgot. Pritam doesn't care about COPYrights)

EIGHT

It turns out me and my friends and my potential friends and my friends from the parallel universe are all GEEKS. We don't Party All Night. Niether do we have liquor flowing all around us. And oh yes.. We all have seen AMERICAN PIE series. O GOD.. if you're there.. you can't do this to me!!
 SEVEN

Talking of GEEKism, this was the reason why I cried alone after a movie, sitting in the wash-room in the multiplex the other day (and oh yes.. the movie was Taare Zameen Par, another reason.. they lifted my life-story!). I've been pretty active on social-networking sites lately. I have all the time in the world. Told you I don't party every day/all night.

I may use the word 'ya' for 'yes' while I talk. Same with 'yo', 'cool' or 'damn'. Words like 'dude' are found in the reputed English dictionaries (and it does not just mean a Camel's dick, so stop forwarding those messages). But there is this class of people who are the trend-setters. They have their own cult. Super-cool guys. Ask them and they'll tell you about " MAH at2de MAH lyf MAH bitch MAH a**hole" Cool ain't this? But how does it matter. I am not one of THEM :( And haven't seen these guys off the Internet either. Where do they live? No one ever figured out. The creator of this life, has been partial, for sure !!



SIX

Talking of social-networking sites, I discovered GOD has a pet name. GAWD. You can stuff as many Ws in there. How unreal. You're nickname is actually longer than your name! Sorry dude, I smell imperfection around you.


FIVE

This one was big. It was about How I met your mother (the SITCOM.. mate, relax!)The times when my faith was getting strong. Reason - Once I saw Barney.. talking to GOD (Its not just colorful, its a LINK moron!). I trusted him. Barney Stinson. Legenn.. wait for it...darryy. I read his blog everyday. The Bro Code - awesome.

But then this Robin thingy!! Barney caught feelings. Doomed. Here's where the faith turned from positive to 0 to negative.

FOUR

Existence of GOD's competitor - sachin_rt ; probably much more dependable.


THREE

 A movie named KITES was released this year. Not the problem. I never saw it. Its music was given by renowned Music Director(citations needed)  Rajesh Roshan. Before the music release, I found an article in Mirror (Not the UK one, not the washroom one either.. it was Pune Mirror) that told a story of how his nephew Hrithik loves Trance, and wanted a track of the same genre to be included in the repertoire. The article further said that Rajesh Roshan has been listening to world's best trance music (thats actually how he creates all his songs). This wasn't the painful part. Disaster struck when I ACTUALLY HEARD THE TRACK CALLED FIRE. 
 

TWO

I saw a video which was something like this.  NOOOO !! Don't click on this one! You'll blame me later on. I'll tell you, its some Justin Bieber guy crying babyy..babyyyy.


ONE
I saw this.

I just love PZ. Though I had never been relishing any thought of this kind... evverr. That doesn't mean I underestimated myself. And cruel world. I mean... Just look at this chhichhoraaa! He got PZ.. I got nuts..

THE END. (We are talking about Faith right now.. so just shut up and read below)


ZERO


Save Tigers, only 1411* left!
(Just added this in case the seasonal I-care-about-this feeling hits back after it boomed in the month of March earlier this year. If it does, this shitty piece might turn out to be the most read one on blogger\m/)

*The number is just symbolic(of the boom I mentioned),it may not be the exact count.


Important : By no means am I making a claim of being an Atheist myself.

PS    - This last image shows renowned Telugu actor Venkatesh, didn't mean to disrespect.
PPS  - No part was intended towards offending any individuals' choices.
PPPS- Clause no. 7 guys, you can take it as an offense though.