Wednesday 19 December 2012

Not Man Enough?

I've been sitting here thinking all day. And I haven't left my place in two days. Confusion and dilemma overshadow the thinking process when it comes to my indignation. Sometimes I hate myself; that maybe I am not man enough. Not man enough - to face the wind - to rise against the drift - to go one better over my own shameless version of apathy - to fight the inhumane. It is said that one should wait for the emotions to dry out. I'm not sure I want to part from these emotions. Emotions constitute an inseparable element to a human life. Without, is what leads to such cold-blooded acts. A 23 year old girl. Being of the same age, I know what she thinks, how she plans out her priorities and what she wants from her life. Before this incident I did. Now, I can barely try to know, to understand what she is going through. I know I will fail. With that, I'll pray she survives. But I can't avoid sharing the blame. A protester's words I heard on a TV channel - Let her not become another statistic.

I am not a believer of the existing system. A system, yes. Can this existing one be improved upon? Though never seen, but can be tried. I feel that implication of law by the fear of punishment is an outdated concept. People willingly commit crimes knowing the consequences; some readily accept the penalty. A replacement if tested thoroughly can be set up. I advocate this replacement. Do I have any ideas? Not exactly. But I hope to find awakened people around with free-thought who want a change for better. Still I like to observe how the current system handles such cases.

I watched the complete Lok Sabha proceedings out of curiosity. The policy makers, no? This is no FDI,  so I expected some discipline. There were a few heart touching speeches - seemingly honest. But you could easily pick out the political gimmicks thrown by opposition and ruling party alike, trying to use this incident, turning odds in their favor. Sire, here everything is at odds. NO ONE gives a fuck. Mulayam Singh wasn't even ashamed to accept this, as, immediately, he tried to transfer the momentum of this proceeding towards his regular agenda of Muslim appeasement. I lost my patience here.

What the system can do? The Constitution of India states clearly about the Fundamental Rights - Nothing in this article shall prevent the State from making any special provision for women and children. Makes sense? Perfectly. The Fundamental Rights of these rapists, child molesters and eve-teasers are worth reconsidering. What does the term EVE-TEASING signify anyway? Why euphemisms to glorify an inhuman act?

Taking the example of this bill for protection against sexual harassment(here) in a work environment, a large section of society has always been worried about misuse of such laws. But where we have evidence or confession from the culprit, as in this case - this opportunity should be used to set an example before the general public. Yes, me and you. The society.

There's a scheme of Fast Track Courts(here) and this tool can be used to try the guilty within a short period. "Golden hours", as UK police trains their officials against rape and sexual harassment, are very crucial for evidence collection, first 24 hours. One month and a half probably for the court proceedings. As I said, the law-system makes its pupils abide by imparting fear. Once proven, make their identity public, ensuring security of their families from "the mob" first. Castration, maybe slicking off penises, and then the death sentence, public again. I am a disbeliever of "the mob" more than I am sceptic about the system. The mob is the basic reason of dis-functionality of a system. They call it a movement, but it is a composition mindless, motiveless public who blindly follow whatever route is set for them. Willingly and easily manipulated and very very impressionable. Apparently, a useless contribution to the community.

The Indian Evidence Act(here) was passed in 1872 by the British Parliament, and since has only been subject to a few amendments. It has no detailed provision for offences like rape or sexual assault. What a democracy! Looking at the other democracies of the world, they are improving upon their system with time. South Africa had made amendments in 2007. England in 2003, Scotland in 2009. USA's 1994. India's politicians are playing ping-pong over this Bill(here) while the laws continue to mock the victims. Don't believe me, just google what an eminent lady Chief Justice has to say about it. And what a politician has to say in general(Dharamveer Goyat, if you may know) - here.

Remember the shameful Guwahati molestation case? Yes, July 9. The news dried out in the media, but a verdict was out on December 7th. 11 found guilty, 3 acquitted. Also that media-boy who filmed it was acquitted. Lack of evidence, they say. I researched into details of the punishment and the charges under various sections of IPC (here) against the eleven men -
143 - six months imprisonment or fine, or both.
341 - one month imprisonment or fine, or both.
294 - three months imprisonment or fine, or both.
323 - one year imprisonment or fine, or both.
354 - two years imprisonment or fine, or both.

And these terms are not all additive in IPC. And the amount of these fines they collect are 500/1000 rupees. So, with a little amount of cash, around 5000/- that barbaric CRIMINAL might be freed off his charges, and let out back in the society. Second offence, the judiciary will wait for it. Hatred is an understatement for what I have in me right now.

I try to think beyond this system, because I can't stand being helpless. I've been vexed about this before but now my own guts scare me. People who know me know how this happened. Something I was told strictly not be proud of. And strictly not to repeat, for my own good. The Dhanteras evening of this year I will never forget. I had returned to my hometown in Lucknow. I had to change a couple of auto-rickshaws from the airport. In the second one, there was a girl who for decent reasons, had some exchange of words with the driver. The auto driver was in some mood to say the things he said to the lady. I wanted to shove those words right up his ass but at the same time I didn't.  Matter got worse, the vehicle stopped with the man posing physical threats. I knew I won't take it if it is someone I care for. So am I going to let this happen because I don't care?

Do you have to be blood related or emotionally attached to someone to prevent such a barbarous act? Human brain makes such moments huge instantaneously. Fear, perhaps. In our college days, I've seen big-assed friends turn to cold-feet before jumping into a physical brawl, with this dilemma of should I or shouldn't I. I have a thick layer of conscience and a huge moral code on top of hatrid for the system. So, I did what I had to. It eased my mind, with a sense of freedom, even though momentarily. What you approve of, or denounce, or follow - all this transforms into mere words. It sends chill down everyone's spine to think that any such a heinous thing can happen to their lot. And as soon as those goosebumps end, they are back to normal, ignorance. Kudos.

My folks say I was lucky to get out safe, maybe it won't be the same next time. They say I should mind that. Bachpan se jo seekha hai na, saala everything is bullshit. No surprises everyone I know talks to me about being practical, growing up or even that with my set of principles I can't survive in a corporate job. And if I don't move on I'm called rigid. If I point out the social wrong I'm called judgmental.

I did not choose this system. I was born into this world and the system was thrust upon me. Socially and personally. Money. Greed. Men and their motherfucking machismo. Gladly, I'm not man enough. My religion, lifestyle - everything- just thrust upon! God, if he is waiting for humans to act while that lady suffers and further prevention measures are taken - is a horrible entity - a puny social consolation. In my teenage days when actor Shah Rukh Khan used to be my idol, I remember him saying that we, the people own the country and appoint the government as an employee to run it for us. Since then I have tried to mould my thinking towards the system and tried to accept it, with no choice at all. The inhuman behavior is well within this system and a part of every civilization. I have a fair bit of understanding to realize that my acceptance is a petty act of cowardice. This, when I am at a young age with a mindset where I think I can change the world. But I have no means. No visible path. Stranded, I feel. Why? Because I'm not man enough. Maybe we are taught to grow up that way.

There is an insatiable desire to break out of all the chaos. Do whatever little is necessary for survival, and live in serenity. And seclusion. Himalayas maybe, where I see my freedom. People take charge and explain to me how seclusion isn't the right thing, that humans need to share/love/communicate to survive. I don't know if right and wrong is that simple. The fact that the society has and will continue to seclude itself from such culpable crimes, that these very people try to wash their hands off the dirt by affirming that they cannot do anything about it - is the reason that I find complexity in their "right and wrong". If you are right in walking away from the time and place where a crime is being committed, if that seclusion is justified - atleast I am not claiming to be there for the people when I am actually not. I don't know. Maybe I try to justify all this because I'm not man enough. I see what I feel wrong, looking past the complexity I mentioned, and still act like I don't care. I do care, but I don't have the courage to act perhaps. Do I justify myself by claiming that I am not a man of violence, or I hate guns? I know, to save my mother, sisters and friends I will more than just use a gun.

You are standing in the fast lane of a highway and telling me that letting a truck run you over is brave and the one way to be, while running away or stopping the vehicle is cowardice? No, running away is not being foolish and acting towards safety is bravery. Cowardice- Well, for me it's NOT TRYING.

Then again I wonder what I am up against? Human weakness, you can't fight it with a gun.

If I had a concrete frame of mind to go either way I would. If I could change the world I would. If I could run away I would.  I can free my mind by seclusion or by inclusion, the problem is choice. Being passionate about the choice I make is most important. Believing in it down to my bones. The purest form of freedom is freedom of mind. It's a bit abstract. If I can free my mind I'll know what is to be done. I'll know how it is to be done. It's similar to being in a state of Moksha, while alive. Till then I'll try not to think too deep. There's more to me than just brains. It's called Coolness. 

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