Thursday, 19 May 2011

TEN dramatic idiosyncrasies of U.N.G.I.N.E.E.R.S



We are incredible.. We can define beauty on a graph-sheet, build a software recreate the Universe, a machine that brings about world peace, and a circuit that replaces Nature! Er..
We do nothing during our 4-year vacation at graduation. Then, we work hard(dude.. seriously!) for that campus placement. We get The Dream Job. Then one day that dream thing turns into a nightmare, water rises upto the neck; and we head towards betterment of the organisational part of the corporate world. We get an MBA - we get The Dream Job-2! Some like myself hear about ROIs and look for an MBA+Dream Job-2 directly. Even then, you'll find us in every freaking job in the world! Best camouflage-ers in the country, WE ARE.
Comparing us to the next big thing post 10+2? We are successful and don't need to lie. We ain't under any "Hippocratic oath"!

Marked with our own individual & specific traits, we usually find a gang of similar people struggling in that some Engineering College. Here's a few common ones, where most of you will connect to atleast one of them!

10. Gyming

A few intelligent boys hit the gym. 2 times a day. 7 days a week. Good... for them:/ Easy to identify though- and not just their not-so-toned muscles. At lunch, all that this kind of a guy will talk is CALORIES. And if he has made some more research, it'll be proteins, vitamins and bla-bla. You, as an impatient listener might never wanna know! Its yummy, you have money. What bigger reason is worth considering?? Having said that, I'm already an idiot by their definition :P

9. Gaming

A guy in his sleep shouts out loud, "Fire in the Hole!". Someone, somewhere in the other part of the hostel goes "Affirmative!". You are not supposed to be scared. These un-earthly words aren't a part of their nightmares! Infact they lead a parallel life to this Engineering-shit, when awake. They GAME. Perhaps, that's the only verb they end up their engineering in. Of course they have a blast(bombs, guns, swords etc) You try to talk to them of adventure, and they'll narrate you how the previous night they freed a princess! If you're lucky-enough you'll meet that one who has a fantasy for the animated-princesses, and vomit next :P
And lest we forget, GO-GO-GO!

8. Wake Up Call

The literal meaning is what we are never struck with. But we do get wake-up-calls on our cellphones. No. Not for lectures :/ Vivas, submissions, Exams! The more important ones.
Who gives that life-saving call, varies with the person-in-sleep. Of course if you have an STD girl-friend, she calls you almost an hour earlier than you EVER could have asked her.. with some emotional melodrama, or while asleep, or hangovers!
For lucky-dogs like me, there always is a friend who has religiously been sleeping at 11 in the night(so he calls it) and waking up at around 6 in the morning. And shitting 15 minutes later. Know what, I often accompany this kinda for a cup of tea in the morning, before going to bed.

7. The Relationship Bug

The STD girl-friend I talked about is the prevalent version of the BUG.When she called you, she just bought some time for the good-lucks, wishes, kisses, i-hate-that-bi*ch, screw-the-moron and oo-YOU're-so RUUDE! chats. For most of those on the other side of this conversation, and very much my protagonist, there are two cases -
Case I : Boy - This piece of rigid humanity usually shies away from his friends to avoid what could turn into a biggest embarrassment of his life. You smell what I'm cooking, don't you!

Case II: Girl - The weirdness is characteristic here; she might be having two of her girl pals listening to what the oOOoo-so-caring and lovely guy is talking to her. And this is not it. Not without mentioning the "awwww..." sound!
mini-PS: When I said oOOoo, the sound has to rise to a higher pitch with O, and fall back to normal with an 'o'. Take note!

6. Bob Marley

This isn't about Music. This ain't about Rastafarianism either. Marijuana? Maybe.. A bunch of guys who have heard the name and think the junkie T-shirts with a Bob Marley print are cool-stuff! And they have a mutual understanding. They never question each other about credible info on this man! All is cool in this part of the world- cool-nuff eh, dude? Oh wait, did I just remind you of the Ernesto 'Che' Guevara's or Kurt Cobain's pseudo-fans? :P
One Love!

5. Hello, this is _____ at your service!

Some of us talk how how drastic it would be to be in a job, the routine life and the working hours! Well, quite contrary, a few others who would love to call it a JOB, work for some extra money.. er, extra on what their parents send them- and for the money they get, they are ready to sacrifice 6 days from their week! Call centres or BPOs(like some may claim, KPOs are different!) are like a new life-line to the hopeless and what-am-I-doing-here lives of these poor souls.
Serves good for booze and more. Though some claim to be doing the same to gain some corporate experience, which certainly they do- the clients from UK have a list of slangs prepared just in case they learn that the caller is from India! :-O Best of luck with that!!

4. Pangaaaa

Though the universities across the country might fail to understand the reasons, but the truth stands, that without a panga in college life, one does not qualify to be an Engineer. Oh, talk of the spirit, the vigour at these times - this is what will make us innovators of the world!
Going a bit deeper.. is actually not an option. Mostly, there are no reasons behind the scene; it's all action! And before you realize, you're into a tussle (for no prize!). Never had a gang, but now suddenly there is a battle for supremacy!
I'd say "You know it only when you've done it"! Also, trust me, first hand knowledge.. even if you are as single-boned or lanky as I am(yeah, I said it :P), and you are in for one, you'll always get that one chance to swing your fist - advice: GO ROCK HARD ON THE JAW! Because you are gonna live with that scar under your eye for a few years anyways :P Atleast, you won't regret those dead cells!

3. Cutting Chai!

Okay, first of all- "cutting-chai" is way too less in quantity for us engineers, or probably anyone with atleast some chillar in his/her pocket. It just sounds cool the way it is said, much like the name of a graffiti magazine ;-) Also, this is not a characteristic of a particular set of people- its universal. Unless you are one of those Coffee-type, who don't like tea. Well, SHUT UP, Bitches! For all the others, it has been the best companion of all times - 3'o clock in the cold-cold night, breakfast, evening break(from doing absolutely nothing), or the morning saviour when you are rushing in to the boring lecture hall, (in rain, hope, despair etc too).
Some of us even love to stare; at the rise-and-fall of the bubbles when being heated right upto the pouring into the cups!
There are sub-classifications within. Like me, for one, can kill for adrak waali chai! And then, Tea goes down awesome with anything right from Marlboro to Four Square. Another class discovered!

2. Know-em-all

Everyone knows this in-true-spirit Ungineer, with vellapanti resulting in him being more popular than The Beatles(damn these controversies!) themselves. I'll emphasize upon the pronoun him as(here comes a fact not much talked about..) girls are already popular in an Engineering college! They are a rare species in this mini-world afterall! Sorry, can't take the hard-earned prize from our type-2 guy! Well, this guy never met a person without a smile, and hand-shake is the next activity he might be doing after every 5 breathe-in's-breathe-out's!(or some statistic..) Sometimes, a great help without even knowing, as what an engineer would call medium for transmission.

1. Music

For much part of their well-engineered lives, they have been dipping into their mp3-players and iPods. Never seen without the headphones, this group has an affinity for stereo-sounds and a dislike for stereo-types. As much as I myself hate to fit in one, I guess somewhere, I-hate-stereotypes are a stereotype! ;-)
We have a an absolute lingo, where we start with A for Aerosmith, B for Bob Dylan, C for Coldplay... and so on! All the conspiracies, controversies and legends are the favorite talk-abouts. Deeply ingrained is the philosophy(as we see it) of the western music culture. The lyrics have an impact more than what any other form of poetry could possibly have. This is what most fail to see, or maybe we see more than there is(I've been told :P).
And okay, before you try to fit in here, let me tell you- we HATE Justin Bieber(fans, especially), or Lady Gaga(as a complete package). So if you are one of them, no Type 1 for you! Infact, we might call your's Muzak. So, STAY AWAY! :-)



I mostly end up with more points than I start with, so if you did not relate to any of those; being a I-know-it-all-genius, or a lick-ass-er, or an arrogant-bastard sorry for ignorance! :/


Last year, when I posted this, I thought it would be kick-ass to continue this TEN affair. I loved it, to be frank! ;-)That's how this one came up.

4 comments:

  1. hahaha... very well compiled... not 1 dude, people will relate to many. wonderful subject, nostalgic fully. :(

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  2. Thanks DG! And rightly nostalgic; that was the inspiration!! :)

    ReplyDelete